Elvis, Buddy Kane, and John Locke

Just as Budwieser is the King of Beers to a few, and Richard Petty is THE King to others, and Buddy Kane is the King of Real Estate to himself, Elvis is indeed a king to some. The answer to Red Star's excellent query at first seems obvious, of course Elvis is not the King of Rock and Roll. His music is essentially irrelevant today, in both subject and sound. If one were to assign kingship based on how much Elvis-ness is in today's (and yesterday's) music then not only would one be in a derivative-spiral (was Elvis the first to perform music that made people want to bone?) but one would *have* to give that honor to The Beatles, or the Stones, or The Stooges, or even W.C. Handy, Son House or Louie Armstrong.

As a not so interesting aside, thinking about Elvis and what music can do to the pelvises of those who make it and those who listen to it reminded me of the greatest NY/NJ Tri-State area dance of all time - the FMNJD - or for those not in the know - the Fuck Me Now J.A.P. Dance. It's not really a dance per se, like the monkey or the swim, but it definitely got its point across at many a northeast high-school homecoming dance or prom.

Back to the Elvis question.... Whereas an objective assessment of his kingliasticity results in a resounding no (NO!) it's clear that objectivity is not the point. As El Vaca points out, most people *think* of Elvis as the king so it doesn't really matter what I think. I think Elvis could be considered a knight if one really wanted to get all mideveal on my ass but I'll submit that Rock and Roll is not a monarchy but rather a democracy. Presidents (Mick Jagger, Peter Frampton, etc.) come and go. There are extemists here (Alice Cooper) and there (David Bowie) who thrive on attention and there are elder statesmen and stateswomen (JJ Cale, Bonnie Raitt, John Hiatt, Lou Reed) who push things along behind the scenes by quietly putting out music that reiterates the lessons of the past or challenges the status quo. Young fired-up rookie representatives (Kurt Cobain, Gram Parsons, etc.) shake things up and the supreme court (Dylan, Led Zep, REM, et. al.) keep reminding us what it's all about. Elvis Presley might be the Thomas Jefferson of Rock and Roll - after all he did take already extant ideas and synthesize them into something that has evolved into our current State of Rock. The Beatles certainly were signers of the declaration. Alexis Korner could be the Elbridge Gerry of Rock and Roll - a relatively unknown figure whose fingerprints are all over the place. I'm not sure who the George Washington, Alexander Hamilton or John Adams of Rock are but a better question might be who are the Rousseau and Locke of Rock.

Fundamentally, Rock is the Gregor Samsa of this, and the last, century. There is no way of knowing what form it will take in the morning. That said, there is no way of knowing who, or what, will be "king". If we remove the shackles of hierarchical and linear thinking in regard to the Art of Rock and instead think of Rock as a fluid undefineable thing then we free our minds to really hear.

And one more thing. Oh my god (-ard!) Whitney. I just looked at the blog and saw what appears to be 20 pages of stream of consciousness begats from Oxford, Mississippi's favorite postmaster. I haven't read your tome yet and I've got a house to board up and anchor to the ground with steel cable in anticipation of Hurricane Ivan so I might not get to it for a while. Please accept my apology.